Turning 40 is a lot.
Exactly how, is an essay in itself, particularly as my list is embarrassingly cliché. Yes, an avalanche of realisations populate the spreadsheet, but we can skip the detail for now. Nobody likes bean counters. Or Tottenham.
The relevance of my first two years on that tricky fourth floor in this context? Thankfully it’s a world beyond the shit bits – a decade containing some wildly liberating and eye opening bits, so whatever this platform becomes, it’s already feeling like a fun addition.
Context. I’m from London. The real London. I’ve spent three decades on camera and the last five years behind it. This is the first place I’m building with bricks of my own making and that in itself is a toast raising, teeth skinning realisation worth enjoying.
Feel free to include your own ‘DiCaprio Gatsby meme’ here. Writing was my way around a very specific kind of bind. See, if you build a career solely on screen, you can’t be off it too long. Why?
The commissioning sausage in Velcro Veja trainers and a ‘wacky jumper’ deciding you’re replaceable by some Youtuber with a ‘deep chats’ visual podcast...
Directing offered further solid ground at a time when TV is forcing some of the most talented people I know to retrain for entirely new careers. I wish I was joking.
So, with a life spent making prime-time TV, broadcasting on national radio, fronting immersive documentaries and playing dress up as an actor, the sudden inability to keep pace with my new found splits, places one question front and centre...
What does the P.B I’m chasing actually look like?
Not too shabby. I think.
Now is quite the serendipitous time to finally embrace the pull of the ‘Stack’ and share more than I’ve become accustomed to given the era I’m from. Social media never reeeeally quite tickled my proverbial pickle as (you may have noticed) short form ain’t my jam.
So, here’s what’s next…
In the coming months I’ll be announcing a book I’m writing, and who my publishers are! I’m also delivering a lot sooner than my better judgement would usually allow. Regardless, it’s a project I’m incredibly proud of given its target audience and ambition.
I’m also in the process of casting actors for my next feature film and there’s a few other projects I’ve been quietly chipping away at that I can’t get into juuuuuust yet, but soon come. The plan is to share the process, the minutiae, the sugar and the shit. I’m too old to pretend anymore. I’m tired bruv.
The Reset isn’t just a snappy title for a series of half thoughts, the reset is a man at 42 realising that the last two years have changed his life. Professionally, romantically, emotionally, spiritually and we should stop there, it’s all getting a little too ‘chicken soup for the soul’. Soz.
I’ve turned a corner in what I’m doing, how I’m doing it and more importantly, who I am.
How that presents, I guess you can be the judge, as the work is on the way and my writing here should allow you to make your own call on what it all means.
For the record, I’m still figuring out how this thing works and reserve the right to rewire the machine should it feel like a change of direction makes sense.
So, if this becomes a baking vlog in three years and I’m one of the Youtubers commissioned by a sausage in Velcro Veja trainers and a ‘wacky jumper’, sorry not sorry. I’m sure my gluten free, vegan, dairy free banana bread will be a delight.
Welcome to THE RESET.
Cheers to the ‘85 babies joining the 40/40 club this year. This was spot on bro! ✊🏽💫
The best is definitely yet to come. Change is the only constant in life and if you don't learn you don't grow 🪴 c'mon what's the book about? 🫴🏼🧚♀️